!!!

It happened again!! 3:24am!!

They're taunting me.

Notes from the Non-Office

Every day for the past, lets say...week, this happens.

At exactly-ish 3:57am and 3:57pm somebody drives down Woodman Ave beeping their horn. Sometimes they try for rhythm and sometimes its random.

I want to know who's doing it, but I don't want to meet them because they are most likely crazy.


That's all, back to non-work.

Things that Suck.

Days Of Our Lives
All My Children
As The World Turns
Making A New Demo Reel
General Hospital
Guiding Light

Books I read...

to Escape!

James Patterson: Mary Mary (crappy)
James Patterson: Four Blind Mice (not so crappy)
I Am Legend (bad ending)

No more Business Days.

FU-IW.

I can't go a day...

Without spilling something on these jeans. Yesterday it was tuna juice and a tub of sugar-free jello and today it's flinging coffee from a straw.

Did somebody say laundry day?

Chicken.

It smells like raw chicken in my office.

IW Thanksgiving in 24 minutes. Mmm, turkey, not raw chicken.

Rule #1 -

Of online Dating.

Don't put up a photo of yourself sitting next to a much more attractive friend. The 'Sexy by Comparison' rule works the opposite as well.

28 Weeks Later.

I hate it when you can blame the entire downfall of civilization on one person or one specific action.

28 Weeks Later, if those damn kids didn't go back for a photo the world would have been fine.
If that man didnt kiss his nasty ass infected wife, the world would have been ok.

WTF man?

Why?

Why does Britney Spears insist on wearing see through shirts?
I would post more photos, but whats the point. She's always in a see through shirt. In this shot, she's Mercedes shopping... go figure.

Little Known Fact...

I actually like chips more than candy.

>

Tootsie Roll!

Why do tootsie rolls come in so many different shapes, sizes and flavors?











I mean, yes, I'll eat them all, but why?
and I want one of these,

Little Sister and Big Daddy -

Bringing home the gold! (gold = Baileys) Mmmmmmmmmmmmmm.....

Just in time.

Coffee time- work time- HALLOWEEN TIME!

catch up on The Office.

**Special** Sunday Pre-Post

So, It's been 1 whole year since me and Rayme started hanging out. Flag football and 7 Deadly Sins exactly 365 days ago today. Very good times have been had by all!


Oct. 27, 2006

Yes!

be jealous, be very very jealous...

9-1-1-800 does not equal 1-800...

It equals 911! Oops.

Newegg = pain in my ass

But i'll get this camera tomorrow!

Reagan Visit!

Fun times start tomorrow.

DOMINICA!

This time next week I will be in Vegas and shortly on my way to Dominica. Hells yeah.

ON....CALL.....WEEK......

I am SOOOOOO sad. I'll cry every morning when I don't have to leave the house!


FALSE!
I love it!!! On call means I get to finally register my car in California! Only 2 years overdue!!!!

Lobster Anyone?

I'm gonna eat a 1.25lb lobster on Sunday because i can.

Thoughts for free.

http://www.zeitgeistmovie.com/





I hope that if I'm in a plane that gets 'vaporized' they can still identify my fingerprints and DNA. Hey, anything is possible.

Gonna get SCUBA cert....

Maybe.

Bahamas are also a maybe. Bimini.

Airplanes and crying babies.

I woke up this morning at 6am in Sarasota, Florida. I ate lunch in Encino, California at 1pm. I went to sleep at 11pm in Van Nuys.

Imagine how impossible this would seem to a person 100 years ago. Very Impossible. We are so lucky.
-----------------------------
5 O'Clock Club....

Erica, Emily & Nick.
9.15.07

Mmmmmmm Grandmas BBQ Ribs....

Florida here I come!

I'll go to the beach at least once and probably eat too much food. Surprise my Grandma and Dad and hopefully get some ribs.

Mmmmmmmm grandmas BBQ ribs.....

Movies and Concepts.

Black Snake Moan - Hell yeah Ricci you whore!
Cinderella III: A Twist in Time - yikes, makes me wanna be a voice actor
Date Movie - annoying.

SQUID!

I used to dissect squids when family would go fishing. Somehow i decided that inspecting the bait was more fun than standing at the end of the dock holding the pole.

No, Pauly Shore you can NOT sleep on my shoulder!

But, I will help you stretch cause the doctor says, you should stretch 3 times a day!

Totally annoying and would not stop pinching my arm!!

P: What are you gonna do over there?
E: Plug in my DS...?
P: No, what are you gonna do in Vegas?
E: Oh, i dont know, meet up with some friends.
P: You need to find some cute boys and get naaaked and get squeeeazed...!
E: yeahhhhhh...... Haaaha.... i don't think that's what i'll be doing.


To be continued when i find the time....

Crying at work.

Ok, not really but I didnt expect to get emotional. I'm not that kind of gal.

Either way, The Devil Wears Prada = FANTASTIC!
(i feel like a gay man writing that)

Bewitched = Ehh.

Lame. I could have done better. Not that i would have wanted to. Just saying.

Along Came Polly = cute, but pretty annoying.

Rachael will always be the same no matter what you call the movie.

Duct and Cover

Duct and Cover

Terrorism Preparedness Guide

The U.S. government has a new website, Ready.gov. It's another attempt at scare mongering in the style of the old "duck and cover" advice after WWII.

The fun thing is that these pictures are so ambiguous they could mean anything! Here are a few interpretations:

If you have set yourself on fire, do not run.

If you spot terrorism, blow your anti-terrorism whistle. If you are Vin Diesel, yell really loud.

If you spot a terrorist arrow, pin it against the wall with your shoulder.

If you are sprayed with an unknown substance, stand and think about it instead of seeing a doctor.

Use your flashlight to lift the walls right off of you!

The proper way to eliminate smallpox is to wash with soap, water and at least one(1) armless hand.

Michael Jackson is a terrorist. If you spot this smooth criminal with dead, dead eyes, run the f**k away.

Hurricanes, animal corpses and the biohazard symbol have a lot in common. Think about it.

Be on the lookout for terrorists with pinkeye and leprosy. Also, they tend to rub their hands together manically.

If a door is closed, karate chop it open.

If your building collapses, give yourself a blowjob while waiting to be rescued.

Try to absorb as much of the radiation as possible with your groin region. After 5 minutes and 12 seconds, however, you may become sterile.

After exposure to radiation it is important to consider that you may have mutated to gigantic dimensions: watch your head.

If you've become a radiation mutant with a deformed hand, remember to close the window. No one wants to see that s**t.

If you hear the Backstreet Boys, Michael Bolton or Yanni on the radio, cower in the corner or run like hell.

If your lungs and stomach start talking, stand with your arms akimbo until they stop.

If you are trapped under falling debris, conserve oxygen by not farting.

If you lose a contact lens during a chemical attack, do not stop to look for it.

Do not drive a station wagon if a power pole is protruding from the hood.

A one-inch thick piece of plywood should be sufficient protection against radiation.

Always remember to carry food with you during a terrorist attack. At least you'll be able to enjoy a nice coke and apple before you die.

Breeding Ground or Magic?

Two crickets in my office in one day. Both in the same exact stop... 10 hours apart. I threw the first one out the door and i'll do the same to the second, but seriously, is my IW bag a breeding zone or something?

If Only...

If only!
http://newyorkette.com/

Nipples for everyone!!!

Um, Eww. I guess if you dont already have them...? Wait, everyone has nipples... even GUYS have nipples! Thats how much nippleage we've already got in this world. Who's gonna pay $20 for additional silly fake nipples!?!?

The natural look is back!
Just look around, from your favorite magazine divas, to the stars on television, women are showing-off their breasts with pride! bodyperks is the latest fashion accessory for your breasts. They make you look and feel wonderfully sassy. Give bodyperks a try - you'll be amazed at the reaction.

The possibilities for fun are endless!
Whether you're out on the town or playing volleyball, bodyperks comfortably stay in place and give you the added attraction of playful, fun breasts. You'll feel and look sexy!

Give your natural assets a lift - try bodyperks today! Only $19.95 plus shipping and handling.

Hey guess what guys, now they come in Mocha!!!
http://www.bodyperks.com/

Um...Daughtry?

Seriously.... who listens to that shit?

CoD4 and the Crybabies...

Awwww, poor babies!..... NOT!




I've come to a brilliant revolution today. I was not meant for customer service... good thing i went to college!

Near the loops, that's a poop cannon!

Not mine!

Check out this site for a HILARIOUS review of Alli 'treatment effects' ALLi

Excerpt:

" Undigested fat cannot be absorbed and passes through the body naturally. The excess fat is not harmful. In fact, you may recognize it in the toilet as something that looks like the oil on top of a pizza.

Here the drug makers are trying to soothe the nerves of the skeptical fatty, by speaking their language. Pizza is something fatties understand, and a big part of the reason they’re interested in Alli to begin with. Pizza is good, pizza is reassuring… even when it’s flowing from your ass like molten lava.

The website mentions seeing the undigested fat in a toilet, but that’s clearly a best case scenario. You might also see it on the tops of your shoes, across the hood of a car, or way up the shower curtain, near the loops."


"Eating a low-fat diet lowers the chance of these bowel changes. Limit fat intake in your meals to an average of 15 grams.

The McDonald’s Big Mac has 34 grams of fat, and the Burger King Whopper has 40. Eat either of these while taking Alli, and you’ll very likely be transformed into a diarrhea cannon. "



and the actual site, http://www.myalli.com/

Fuel in the AM, for me and the car.

Why is it that getting gas in the morning always takes about 15 hours longer than getting gas at night?

Seriously...15 hours AND I have to go inside to get a receipt. Why the hell do i have to go inside to get a receipt? Isn't that the point of me paying at the stupid pump? If i wanted to come inside and wait in line I would just pay that way! I don't want to come inside and listen to the man tell you about his debit card and the woman buy her smokes. My frappichino is melting, my latte is getting cold and I've got shit to do!!!!
(Yes, i bought myself two drinks at Starbucks this morning. A certian 'somebTodDy' discourages my coffee drinking habit, so i like to indulge myself when he is gone. Yes, I will regret it later when I can't get my hands to stop shaking and my eyes won't focus on the screen, but I'll cross that caffeinated bridge when i come to it... at say... 3pm.)

Anyone who uses the word 'fine',

As in this quote from Craigslist,

"...but when guy's act like that, i think in my head...."dude you will be lucky if you ever talk to me again" i don't care how 'fine' you are."

is not someone i'd like to meet. I can just see them bitchin at the top of their lungs about how they only get attention from the 'wrong' type of guys.


Yes, I've been browsing a lot of CL lately. I think it's funny. It's like Jerry Springer, but instead of seeing the chairs fly across the stage you get to use your imagination.

Goodmorning Sunshine.

I wish that all my belongings were colored different shades of coffee.




Oh, and contained coffee.